Escape your Comfort Zone

“I have a dream.” These iconic words were spoken by Martin Luther King Jr when he gave a speech in 1963. I am sure that all of us, like Martin Luther King, have dreams. That dream may be to own a car, buy a house, write a book, start your own business or to find a new hobby. You spoke it, you wrote it down, and then nothing happened. Why did nothing happen? Because you left it on paper. Why did you leave it on paper? Because you are likely stuck in your comfort zone.

The pleasure of the comfort zone

Picture yourself in bed on an extremely cold, rainy morning. Your alarm goes off signaling that it is time to get up. You can hear the wind outside, the rain pelting heavily on the roof and you are snuggled nicely in your bed under a warm, comfortable blanket. It is a work morning, but it’s so hard to get up. You lay in bed debating whether or not you should take the day off and just not go.  Do you think the struggle would be so great if you were lying on the cold, hard floor, hugging yourself to keep warm? Of course not. This is what is happening to many of us today. We are very comfortable in our present situation which hinders us from moving.

What are some things that keep us stuck in our comfort zone?

1. Fear of the unknown

Many of us are very reluctant to move ahead unless we can see everything laid out in front of us. We want to be guaranteed success before we even start, often missing out on the many learning experiences on the journey. How much easier would it be to navigate life if it came with a GPS that tells us when to go left or to go right? Unfortunately, this doesn’t exist. This is the nature of life but we have survived thus far. We moved from the classroom into the work world, from single to married, and so on. This was all unfamiliar to us, but we did it. Humans are resilient and will adapt to their circumstances. You have made it this far, but there is still further to go. Yes, the unknown is scary, but if you don’t venture into new territory, you won’t grow.

2. Waiting for the right time

How many of us have said, “I am going to do it, but the time is not right?” How long ago was that? 1 year? 2 years? 10 years? How many of our dreams have died waiting for the right time? When you look around, you see successful people that you often wish to be like. Do you think that all these people had the timing just right? I can tell you, most didn’t. When I started my business, it was a new area for me so everything was very unfamiliar. There was so much to learn. Added to that, I was juggling school, work and church, all while being a single mother. Was the time right? It wasn’t. However, sometimes you have to adjust your life to accommodate your dreams. I could always find more time for work, school or church; why not my dreams?

3. Fear of failure

One of the most common reasons many of us are stuck in our comfort zone is our fear of failure. Many of us aren’t where we are supposed to be because we were afraid to fail. Failure is often viewed as a bad word. Truth be told, none of us like to fail but failure is a part of life. It is also one of the surest way to success. Think about a baby learning to walk and taking their first steps. What if when they took that first tentative step and fell, they just decided “Oh well, I guess this walking thing is just not meant for me. I will stick to crawling”. Imagine if they never tried again? How would they have learned to walk? And then run? That is what has happened to many of us. We are stuck crawling when we should be running because we fell once and never got back up.

I remember the first time I made fried dumplings when I was a young teenager. Having seen my mother make dumplings numerous times, I thought I did an excellent job. I happily shared breakfast for my siblings and then my eldest brother started laughing at me. He said that my dumplings could be used as stones because they were so hard. Amid his laughing, he told me I didn’t add enough baking powder and that I should add more next time. I felt very discouraged and disappointed. My mother makes the best dumplings and so I wanted mine to be perfect like hers (on my first try).

What did I learn?

As I reflect, at the time I put so much pressure on myself to make dumplings as good as someone that had been making dumplings with at least 30 years of experience. While it is good to have a benchmark, you should not get discouraged when you do not meet their standard. Give yourself grace to learn and grow. I kept trying and today I make awesome dumplings. This taught me an important lesson – success often follows failure. All the people that we admire experienced failures. The only reason they are a success today is because they didn’t give up.  It is important that we change how we view our failures. First, what you did failed, you are not a failure. Secondly, look at your failures as an opportunity to learn and do better. Do not be fearful. Step forth boldly because fear doesn’t just prevent failure; it also hinders success.

4. Feelings of insecurity

There are times when you have the conviction to chase your dreams but you just don’t believe you have what it takes. You are not alone. From biblical example, we can see that many of the persons God called didn’t believe they could do what he called them to do. Let us take a look at two of these examples:

Moses

God identified Moses as the one who would lead the Israelites out of captivity. Moses didn’t believe that he was capable of completing the task. He even went as far as to ask God, “Who am I that I should go?” and God responded “I will be with you.” (Exodus 3: 11-12). He then questioned, “What if they don’t listen to me?” (Exodus 4:1), to which God replied He would use signs (Exodus 4:2-9). Moses was still not convinced. He tried to reason with God “I have never been eloquent….I am slow of speech and tongue,” to which God responded, “Who gave human beings their mouths?…. Is it not I, the LORD? Now go; I will help you and teach you what to say.” (Exodus 4:10-12). You would have thought that would have been enough to convince Moses but He still replied, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else.” Moses eventually obeyed and ended up leading his people to freedom.

Gideon

The story of Gideon is told in Judges 6 and 7. The Israelites had done evil in the eyes of Lord and for seven years He gave them into the hands of the Midianites. One day an angel of the Lord appeared and said to Gideon “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand.” Gideon replied, “But how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.” The LORD answered, “I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites, leaving none alive.” Gideon did not believe that he could and asked, “If now I have found favor in your eyes, give me a sign that it is really you talking to me.” God showed Gideon the sign and he was still not convinced. He asked God to show him another sign, which He did. Gideon went on to save the Israelites from the Midianites.

You can escape your comfort zone

It is not uncommon to look at ourselves and believe that we are incapable of completing the task assigned. Do not be afraid to try new things or retrying things you would have failed at. Two important points are highlighted in the stories of Moses and Gideon. The first is that we can’t rely on our own strength and capabilities. Who the Lord calls He equips. All He requires is our obedience. The second point is that although we may have our weaknesses, doubts and fears, if we depend on God we can experience His strength. What the Lord did through these men was bigger than either of them thought themselves capable of. He can do the same for you.

There is much waiting for us outside of our comfort zone. Let us be intentional about overcoming the challenges that hold us back so that we can embrace the ‘purpose-full’ life that God has called us to live.